A few days back when I was driving to work. I got stopped at a red light. It was taking so long that I was late for work! Then I noticed in the blink of an eye. It was a senior, taking a walk. The senior was walking SO slow. It is like, she was going in slow motion. But I knew that someday I will be that fragile too. So I wait half an hour for the lady to walk over to the next block. But then she suddenly falls on the ground. I get out of my car to help her but she waves me back. She stands with all her might and walks off into the big great crowds of New York.
Hello this is about if I had my own world this and how what it would be like. I did this because in my classroom we were dong a project in class about if we had our own world and how would it be like.Enjoy! IN MY WORLD In my world there would Be no such thing as War In my world every library would have Space for every book that the Kids want In my world there would be No crime In my world everybody Is accepted except for the people who are evil In my world people can play any sports In my world everyone is FREE
Hi Karim! What a lovely idea in your story that you wait for someone old and fragile as you know that it may happen to you one day.
ReplyDeleteCan you check your first few sentences? They don’t quite make sense and your punctuation needs to be in the right place to help it sound right when read aloud. Perhaps a friend can read it out loud to you?
I like the way you used capitals to emphasise how slowly they were walking.
Well done and keep writing!
Mrs Badge
Napier class, Catherine Junior school, Leicester UK